The Soup Nazi
Mongoosedog, this is for you.
This is high brow humor.
April 2010
194 posts
Public transportation is always an adventure for me
There is for real not one unattractive girl on this bus right now. One guy, judging from the color of his mouth, is drinking wine out of a can. This really old fat guy is screaming to the bus driver, who is also fat and old, about his old army days and how he lost his hearing aid.
March 2010
253 posts
This Macy's employee is a mad cunt
So I’m checking out some suits, and this lady gives me the biggest eye roll and sigh when I ask for some help. Probably because I look a poorgeoisie and she thinks I’m not actually going to buy anything. Then when I reject a couple suits she recommends because they’re tacky as shit and I throw terms out there like the lapels being too large or how I would never wear a black suit to an interview, she starts getting the idea that I’m no hobo. Then I casually mention how my parents might be totally paying for it as an early birthday present and her eyes lit up like she just saw her first penis. Subtle, lady.
Now she’s showing me some overpriced piece of shit that I know would fit me like a potato sack even after the tailor goes to town on it. So I’m totally ignoring her and typing this post on my phone nonchalantly like it isn’t important but still making it look like its way more interesting than listening to her.
I'm the favorite
- Sister: Mom and Dad forgot my bday... low blow.... low blow
- Me: HAHAHAHA. to be honest I only remembered because of facebook
- Sister: Its a sad day when you text your mother at 9pm "u forgot my bday" and thennn her and dad call me.
- Me: Well now we can definitely put to rest the argument of who's the favorite.
I'm so bored, I hate writing essays, the library depresses me, so here I am talking to a stranger on the internet. whatevs, you're really entertaining. I request more posts (as in NOW even if it is nighttime yourtime..) for entertainment/distraction/procrastination tools. please?
OK BYE NOW
Thanks, as a fellow procrastinator I feel your pain. Strangely, I have gotten a shit load of work done on my huge econ project that isn’t even due till Sunday.
I’ll try to bring my A game and post some gems, but I honestly I see myself making some tea and watching the new Lost episode I totally forgot was on today.
Dirty Diana
Michael Jackson
Dirty Diana - Michael Jackson
Has everyone jumped off the “MJ just died so now I love him” train?
30 seconds ago
I hate this chair.
Play
Why do you use 3 different web browsers?
Safe to assume you’re talking about my library pic, nice eye. I use Chrome as my main browser, so I’m on that 99% of the time. Firefox I use for testing sites out to make sure they display properly, but I feel its getting too bloated to use all the time. Opera 10.5 I just started using, which is uber fast and really sleek, not sure if I’m going to switch though. In love with Chrome too much. I also have IE open sometimes, but just for testing obviously.
This is what my desktop usually looks like, sans Opera and FF.
I totally forgot it was my sister's birthday
Don’t worry though, I was reminded when my news feed on Facebook was being filled with birthday messages for her.
Facebook saves me from so many bad situations.
“I know your internet voice”
—Sade
I hate making small talk
I went to Subway and the line was long as hell and there was only one guy working, but I wanted my Spicy Italian really bad so I blasted my jams and waited. Then this one dude I sort of knew from back home gets in line behind me and starts talking with me.
Ughhhhhhh, he spent the entire time talking about how he helped his dad finish their basement over break.
things i don't understand
and definitely am not going to talk about:
- diva cup
I had no idea this thing existed until right now.
Me while reading the description.
If you Facebook friend request me
and I don’t remember you, but your default is a picture of you standing like one of the Queen’s guards next to an expensive car that is clearly not yours.
I won’t be accepting your request.
